Sizing is one of the things that confuses the hell out of me, for example just what is a waist size 18 anyway or for that matter what is a size 4 for heavens sake ?? You are what you are ..... a HAARD fact and a simple one. If your waist measures to be 110cm then that is what you are mate, 110cm, a size 10 may sound better but I've decide to stay with actual and real measurement for designing the various clothing. Just get a measuring tape and check yourself out, you can go by the size on your latest jeans but even those sizes vary between label to label and aren't always true.
HAARD hint : my garments are designed to look a certain way, the cut, fabric and overall design has been made to be worn according to the measurements as labeled. It is your choice and your fault if you wear them incorrectly not mine.
How do you measure up ?
Chest
Waist
Pouch
HAARD hint: If you have to take your own measurements then grab a mate and get them to help you, it will be more accurate unless the truth is going to hurt ?
- Don't measure over top of heavy clothing.
- Be as near to naked as you can as we are dealing with bodywear here and not sloppy home-boy street clothing. In this case make sure you feel comfortable with the person you get to measure you up .... and chew on some mints ;-)
- Don't puff up your chest it's not mating season so there isn't any impressing to be done.
- Stand as you normally would. When getting you waist measured sucking in your guts may make you feel better, especially if it's the first time you have seen your toes in a long time hahaha, but if it's not your normal stance forget it your clothes won't fit the way they're designed to look.
- If your waist size falls on the borderline between two sizes and with underwear or swimtogs in mind, then choose the larger or smaller size depending upon how snugly you like your nuts held.
- Keep in mind that our clothing is made from quality cloth and will maintain their shape over time ..... unlike most of us.
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Chest
For shirts and tops hold the measuring tape well up under the arms so that it goes across the fullest part of the shoulder blades and just over your nipples, unless it is very cold then you may have to go under them.
Make sure that the tape is taunt, but not tight, that it is straight, (the tape not the friend measuring you), and theat you are standing naturally.
Chest Size Guide
|
Aust Size
|
Aust. cm
|
Aust. inches
|
Continental Europe
|
UK
|
USA
|
Japan
|
|
S
|
92
|
36
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
37
|
37
|
14.5
|
14.5
|
S
|
|
M
|
97
|
38
|
38
|
15
|
15
|
M
|
|
|
|
39
|
39
|
15.5
|
15.5
|
M
|
|
L
|
102
|
40
|
40
|
16
|
16
|
L
|
|
|
|
41
|
41
|
16.5
|
16.5
|
L
|
|
XL
|
107
|
42
|
42
|
17
|
17
|
LL
|
|
|
|
43
|
43
|
17.5
|
17.5
|
LL
|
|
2XL
|
112
|
44
|
44
|
18
|
18
|
LLL
|
|
|
|
45
|
45
|
18.5
|
18.5
|
LLL
|
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Waist
For Jocks or underwear, swimwear, track pants or shorts, measure around your waist. If you tend to wear your jeans half way down your arse then you have no idea of what a waist is and you're in deep shit ...... check out the pic above. Don't measure half way near your rib cage either, but just your waist, if it makes it any easier then check out other clothing you have and get an idea from them as they may be various sizes. Manufactures these days try to compliment you and give smaller sizes so you feel better about yourself and all those party pies you've been hogging in to.
(Don't worry, you can still get someone to get down on their knees in front of you and measure you up if you have to, just remember to stand naturaly and keep those erotic thoughts well out of your mind !
Swimwear Size Guide
|
Size
|
CM
|
Inches
|
Euro
|
No.
|
|
2XS
|
65 - 70
|
26 - 28
|
1
|
10
|
|
XS
|
70 - 75
|
28 - 30
|
2
|
12
|
|
S
|
75 - 80
|
30 - 32
|
3
|
14
|
|
M
|
80 - 85
|
32 - 34
|
4
|
16
|
|
L
|
85 - 90
|
34 - 36
|
5
|
18
|
|
XL
|
90 - 95
|
36 - 38
|
6
|
20
|
|
2XL
|
95 - 100
|
38 - 40
|
7
|
22
|
|
3XL
|
100 - 105
|
40 - 42
|
8
|
24
|
|
4XL
|
105 - 110
|
42 - 44
|
9
|
26
|
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Pouch
With the release of our underwear some of our stlyes will afford you the opportunity to select a 'pouch' size as a custom feature for some of you out there that find normal briefs great but to constricting. As for the fit, well this could be a tricky one as no doubt you are all hung like donkeys aren't you ? yeah right ! Now, back to reality, the pouch size is by default 'AA' because after our clinical trials the lab rats came in with a 90% rate of being of our AA sizing.
Should you get HAARD and find that the pouch is too constricting, either because you find them too tight and your voice has raised by an octave or two or you're falling out of them then you'll know that next time you have to go up or down a size. For obvious reasons of hygiene, we cannot accept items back once they have been worn. International and federal laws prohibit the return of articles worn against the body for health and sanitary reasons.
These garments and options are still works in progress so keep an eye out for their launch.
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